This new mum is going to a party tonight

This new mum is going to a party tonight

This is my first party. It’s a birthday party of two of my friends and my boyfriend is going to take care of our son while I’m there.

No he is not going to babysit. He is a dad. He is going to take care of him like every mum or parent is doing.

It might be a bit silly to try and be politically correct about it, but then again it’s not. And there is no doubt that mums are very important for the first year of a baby’s life (of course for their entire life as well) but it’s ok for a dad to let mum have a night out sometimes. So dads do not babysit. Do mums babysit? No. So, neither do dads. Period.

Of course I’m not going to get wasted or anything. I feel already hangover and I’ve been feeling that since the birth of my son. That is almost 5 months ago.  Funny how sleep deprivation, exhaustion and heavy drinking feel the same.

Even the thought of drinking one sip of wine makes me wanna throw up already. But maybe beer is fine I guess.

Well, ok, I’ll let you know how it went tomorrow.

Have a great Saturday mums around the world and enjoy your wine 🙂 You deserve it!

 

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Why are (exclusively) breastfeeding moms so mean to non-exclusive BF or formula feeding moms?

Why are (exclusively) breastfeeding moms so mean to non-exclusive BF or formula feeding moms?

When I got pregnant  was like “of course I will breastfeed” I mean, why not? It’s cheap, easy and natural.

Boy, was I naive.

Breastfeeding is the best thing for your babies. NO-QUESTION-ABOUT-IT.

And I will support you to the end if you want to breastfeed and I will support your right to the end to breastfeed wherever the fuck you want.

But if you don’t manage to breastfeed or if you simply don’t want to, I will still support you.

As I said, I wanted so badly to breastfeed and I’m sure I have mentioned this here before what a difficult journey that was.

My baby latched instantly. Happiness. It was the best feeling ever and the first time I experienced anything like that. And painful but I could tolerate it.

So even though I was physically destroyed from a long and painful labour, I knew that I wanted to breastfeed instantly and so I’m happy that I did it.

But for reasons that I don’t want to mention here (maybe I will tell you my whole breastfeeding story on a separate one) I had to supplement and after 4 months, sadly, it was over. Not because of supplementing but because I decided to end it.

My biggest complaint in this is the mum wars. Why do some mums have a physical need to judge and shame others? Especially exclusively breastfeeding mums – NOT ALL OF THEM of course – but this is the group that I’ve seen being the most judgmental, inconsiderate and rude towards other mums.

Do you have any idea how much you hurt those who have struggled with breastfeeding and opted for formula as their last resort with your “you haven’t tried enough” comments?

I know I shouldn’t let them get to me but reading how demeaning and cruel and absolute they are in their comments and conclusions I can’t help but feeling sad and hurt. And angry and pissed as hell. Sometimes even inadequate and a failure as a mum.

But no mum should feel like that. You are doing what’s best for your baby and I’m sure it’s been a hard road.

I should listen to my own advice and stop paying attention to these ignorant mums who, for some reason which is beyond me, feel they are superior to the rest of us.

I know in a few months none of this would matter and I will probably look back at my old me and think “ha, how silly I was for letting them affect me”. But I’m not there yet and I just wanted to vent a bit.

Stop listening to anyone else but your own instincts  and be the best mum you can be.

What do (new) mums with babies eat?

What do (new) mums with babies eat?

Whatever they f*ing can!

No time for big dinners, no time for fancy gourmet dishes. Just eat whatever you see in front of you.

Do you see an apple, a banana? Just grab it. Do you see a half eaten sandwich? Eat that away. Do you see nuts? Just grab as much as you can and shove them inside your mouth. Do you see a cold pizza? Don’t be picky just swallow it.

You are hungry. Just put some calories inside your body because you bloody need it.

But ok, seriously, here are some tips for the new and hungry mum.

  1. When you have the time prepare some snacks. Bread, cheese and hum (or anything soya if you are vegan) with some butter or margarine it’s a great snack for when you are on your 3rd nursing hour.
  2. Pasta dishes. They are fast and they give you the energy that you need. If you don’t mind, buy a few ready made tomato sauces. Or a ready made pesto jar. Fast, easy and delicious. Oh and add a few olive oils inside your dish. Yummy.
  3. Buy fruits. Bananas, apples and anything that doesn’t require any weird instrument to eat. Just wash or peel and eat!
  4. It might not be cost effective but you can do it once in a while. Buy ready made pre-cut sallad. I know it gets expensive in the long run but it’s faster and healthy. You need healthy.
  5. Ok ok, buy the candy bars you are craving for. Breastfeeding or just attending to your new born requires lots of energy. Do it. Eat that chocolate. You deserve it.

Well these are pretty much my tips and that’s how I survived the new born days. Not that I’m any better now but I manage to get 30 minutes to prepare a more appropriate dish…occasionally.

Good luck mums and enjoy whatever you can eat.

xoxo

Why “Sleep when baby sleeps” is the worst advice ever

Why “Sleep when baby sleeps” is the worst advice ever

Sleep is a precious thing and once we become parents it becomes a thing of the past. mother-1499674-1280x1280

The first weeks with a new born are  – to put it mildly – hectic. You get your survival mode on and you just exist.

Yes you should try and sleep as much as possible and if you manage to sleep when baby sleeps then congrats! I honestly believe you are part of the minority here.

I know that everyone who says that means well. But let’s be realistic here so please don’t mention the word sleep or do not try to offer sleep advice to a sleep deprived parent unless you want to be slapped right in the face. I love you all but please stop 🙂

Here’s why it’s an unrealistic advice:

  1. When baby sleep it’s the best time for you to go the toilet and be kind to your kidneys for the a change.
  2. When baby sleeps it’s the best time to eat something. I had no idea that I would be holding my baby almost 24/7. I was so naive to think that a baby will stay calm and relaxed once you put it in its bassinet. Oh stupid ignorant me.
  3. When baby sleeps it’s the best time to do some dishes. I know I know, cleaning the house it’s not a priority during this time but come on. I need at least one plate and one glass to survive.
  4. When baby sleeps it’s the best time to browse the internet. You know do something just for you. Or just watch TV, or read a magazine or newspaper. Or just stare the the ceiling because you fucking  want to.

But then again that magic moment comes where you DO fall asleep when baby is sleeping and you manage to get some rest. Oh sweet sleep I missed you so much. But in my experience sleep when baby sleeps is the exception of the rule.  It’s the only time I get to go to the toilet for n.2 (TMI I know sorry).

So please give us a break. Yes we are not stupid. We know we should take advantage of any break we have but sometimes it’s just not possible.

Oh sweet Nespresso machine, how much I love you.

 

Yay it’s the weekend. Oh wait, you’re a mum …or does it really matter?

Yay it’s the weekend. Oh wait, you’re a mum …or does it really matter?

Friday evening. Oh that sweet sweet relaxation feeling that comes from the knowledge that tomorrow morning you don’t need to wake up early because it’s Saturday.

Friday evening. The best day of the week to enjoy a glass of wine or your alcoholic beverage of choice. It’s not that you can’t drink on any other day, it’s just that on a Friday everything tastes way better.

And then suddenly you become a parent.

Friday evening. Just another day of the week. You will be waking up a couple of times during night (if you are lucky) to feed your baby and you will be waking up the exact same time as every other day because your precious little one doesn’t know the meaning of a weekend yet. And it won’t. Not until it becomes a teen.

But personally it’s not that bad. I read an article online (sorry I can’t seem to find it, I will edit and add the link once I do) that says why weekends are actually good even if you are a parent. And by parent I mean mum (at least in my case) and I couldn’t have agreed more with this article.

Why?

For starters daddy is around. That means that the mum can enjoy a coffee/a shower/or just peeing in piece while daddy has the baby.

Daddy helps with the household giving mum a break. If he doesn’t, take a frying pan and hit him in the head to come around.

It’s a great time for family quality time, whether that’s hanging around in the house playing with the baby or going out for a stroll.

Or in this morning’s case, daddy takes baby for a stroll to spend some nice father-son time and mummy gets to enjoy a nice and quiet morning blogging and browsing techy things.

I’m a geek, a nerd if you like, and I love reading technology articles, blogs about gadgets and listening to tech related podcasts.

I miss doing that on a regular basis but it’s nice getting a chance to do it even once in a while.

The upside of this is that I got a wonderful boy, which is the joy of my life and I wouldn’t trade that for the world. So he can keep me sleepless and tired as much as he wants and he can deprive me of my tech podcasts. He has every right in the world to do that and I want him to.

Now off I go to finish my delicious latte.